Even Higher

13 Adar I 5782

“Consequently, now, at this time, when observing himself he sees that ’the light of the soul does not penetrate into him,’ it is evident that either (a) today his repentance has not been accepted and his sins [still] separate him or (b) it is desired that he be raised to a more sublime level of repentance, coming from a point yet deeper in his heart.” (Lessons in Tanya, Likutei Amarim, middle of Chapter 29)

Far from being shallow punishments from Hashem, moments of timtum halev, coldness of the heart, are moments of tremendous opportunity for spiritual growth. They come only to show us that our relationship to Hashem up until this point has not been deep enough, otherwise this coldness would have had no hold on us. Instead of performing the “crushing of the self” the Alter Rebbe describes in this chapter as a demoting exercise, purely to crush one’s own ego, it should serve as an introduction to an even deeper and more truthful relationship to Hashem.

“They sacrificed [to the calf].” (Shemos 32:6)

We also see that moments of lapse in our divine service serve as an opening for even greater teshuva in today’s Parshah:

“How could the people who witnessed G‑d’s miracles and experienced His revelation at Mount Sinai commit such a blatant transgression so soon afterward? True, only a small percentage of the people worshipped the Calf, but even this is hard to imagine.

The sages of the Talmud (Avodah Zarah 4b and commentary of Rashi) therefore teach us that indeed, the Jews at that point were incapable of sinning. In order to enable the people to rise to the heights of spiritual achievement only attainable through repentance, G‑d ‘forced’ the entire incident upon them.

In this light, we can all focus on our past misdeeds as opportunities through which we can scale spiritual heights that we could not rise to otherwise.” (Daily Wisdom, Lubavitcher Rebbe)

“But as for me, I will always hope; I will add to all Your praises.” (Tehillim 71:14)

This is why we should not dwell in moments of timtuv halev, but immediately turn them around for the better, with the techniques the Alter Rebbe teaches us in this chapter. We should always draw hope from the certainty that this too is only to strengthen us in our divine service, until we can even add to His praises by ascending even higher than we were before.